Cinc lliçons de vida apreses de Gats i Relacions

Quan vaig conèixer el meu xicot, Christopher, fa cinc anys, I had only one pair of flat shoes – scuffed boots from college. Thinking back on my undergraduate experience, Dubto que fins i tot els portava 10 vegades, com els talons alts porten a la majoria dels meus viatges cap ai des de la classe a menys d'una polzada de gel recobreix campus, at which point I relied on a wedge. Alright, I embelliment aquest últim (una mica.) A girly girl in every way, Jo no sabia com fer pantalons de xandall bonic o es senti còmode mostrant la cara sense una màscara de maquillatge, and I never foresaw this changing. But it did, i espero que ho fa per altres dones, també.

No és que hi hagi res dolent amb maquillatge i talons d'agulla - gaudir! Just don’t depend on them. When I look at magazines and the constant barrage of media surrounding us, I don’t have to wonder why so many women are on shaky ground in the confidence department. I share with you the following lessons I’ve learned from my feline companions and the straight-shooting man in my life:

1. Abraça els teus marques individuals: On one of my first summer dates with Chris, I panicked about how pale I looked and resorted to self-tanner. When I say I’m pale, Vull dir que estic d'alabastre translúcid vorejant, so this quick-fix led to nothing but streaks of orange and regret. When he (sabent) qüestionat si hagués vaig posar autobronzejador, Vaig venir net (encara que no en el sentit literal, com la implicada una setmana d'exfoliació.) He asked me why I would do that considering I had a beautiful and rare skin tone. I’d never heard anyone refer to my skin that way, i em vaig sentir tan ximple per intentar canviar alguna cosa únic amb un producte que feia olor metàl·lic i vaig deixar els meus pijames i vestits blancs van enterbolir.

Els nostres socis volen que ens assemblem a nosaltres mateixos, i hauríem de voler, també. It’s similar to having a dating profile photo that looks nothing like you, photoshopped past the point of recognition. We’re all unique, and those things that make us different also make us stand out from the crowd. Find the confidence to show your real markings and not covet others’.

Com per als gats, the same holds true. A calico is no more beautifully marked than a tabby – it’s all in the eye of the beholder.

2. No s'avergonyeixi cos: Dues de les meves gats són molt petits, 2 són de complexió mitjana, and two are large. They do not know this. My biggest cat jumps on the cats half his size and wonders why they aren’t thrilled with the wrestling play date. If only women could stop the body-bashing we both despise and oddly facilitate. We come in all kinds of shapes and sizes, and yet I hear so many of my friends go on and on about perceived body flaws. These perceptions are then coupled with fears about how men view their bodies in comparison to Victoria’s Secret models. That kind of self-talk leads to generalizations we make about not only our own bodies, but bodies in general. I cringe when I hear quotes like, “Real women are curvy.” Beautiful women come in an array of shapes, so let’s embrace whatever figure sees us in our healthiest form. Men don’t want to hear us tear apart our bodies, i que massa sovint els posem en situacions en què no poden guanyar, no matter their responses. Kate Upton, Kate Winslet, i Kate Moss són tots diferents builds, però no són tots ells considerats universalment bella?

Durant molt de temps, No podia suportar que les meves cames no s'enganxen prim, so imagine my surprise when Chris told me that he loved my legs and recommended that I wear more shorts and skirts. The right person is going to like your body and not force you to reshape it. Always remember that.

3. Gaudiu del menjar: Ah, the thrill of treats. When I shake that bag of enticement, all six of my cats charge forward at my feet. They love food to the point where it’s an event. Who can blame them? Like so many women, I waged war with food as I suffered the above-noted body shame of not feeling perfectly svelte in a bikini. I weigh five pounds more now than when Chris and I first met, però a canvi que, I’ve shared lots of pizza with him during Friday night TV binges. I wouldn’t trade those for any number on the scale. I’m far more comfortable with my body at 31 del que mai estava en la meva joventut.

Menjar sa és una cosa meravellosa, i jo sóc un ferm creient en la cura d'un mateix (vegi baix.) Enjoying life and all its flavors, encara que, és un molt gran cosa, també. Don’t focus so much on your calorie intake that you lose track of enjoying the meal – and the conversation that accompanies it.

4. Cuida't: When my cats are tired, they sleep. (Tots estan absolutament esgotats, a propòsit.) When another cat upsets them or invades a designated space, they have no reluctance in voicing disdain. So often, fem èmfasi sobre parlar nostres ments, or we let someone treat us in a way that we wouldn’t treat someone else. Gats, i els homes, per al cas, tenen una tendència a xiular i acabar d'una vegada, thus moving on with their lives and not holding on to resentment or bitterness. They usually don’t take things so personally, i saben que és millor deixar que els seus veritables sentiments mostren que per portar en un acte i volar més tard.

L'honestedat és fonamental en les relacions, and the right partner will love you even when you’re less than loveable to the outside world. If you can’t voice what you really want, llavors, com serà la seva parella donar-te'l?

Aquest és un un d'aquests dur, especially for those of us who strive toward agreeableness. If it’s any help, try to think of wording things in a way that you would not take offense at if they were said to you. That way, you’re saying what you think without having to lose sleep over the issue. The more you do this, the more naturally it will come to you. In my home, xiulets i ronc són dos sorolls comuns, i tots dos indiquen un tipus de respecte: per als altres i de nosaltres mateixos.

5. Existeixen en aquest moment: I’m always amazed at how my cats watch birds with a focus similar to how Chris plays video games. The old adage of stopping to smell the roses is famous for a reason – which brings me back to high heels.

La meva col·lecció de sabates d'edat tenia alguns magnífics colors i adorns de tires, i encara tinc unes quantes parelles esperant al meu armari per a la roba adequada, or at least for this polar vortex to lose its grip. When Chris and I went on our first trip together to Las Vegas, Vaig ficar uns cinc parells, imaginant lluentons interminables i plomes (aparentment, en el meu cap, Vegas significava vestir-se com una corista.) How many of those pairs did I end up wearing? Zero. En lloc, meus sandàlies objectiu colpejar la franja concreta que la setmana, and I remember feeling so thankful I had them. Countless girls struggled around us in platform shoes, crippled by peep-toe torture. I sincerely wanted to offer them a bench and some band-aids, sabent que els meus vint anys sí hauria lluitat al costat d'ells.

Els meus gats mai es perdi d'esquirol mirant només perquè poguessin suavitzar la seva pell en el seu lloc, i jo mai podria haver mantingut al dia amb Chris tenia I sandàlies desgastades amb un 4 inch lift. Sovint, les millors vacances confien en sensates calçat i passar hores fent pràcticament res.

La vida és tot sobre el cultiu, and relationships can help us better understand ourselves as we stumble and succeed. Likewise, relacions poden beneficiar-se de confiança en si mateix, honestedat responsable, and indulging in some treats now and then. Esperem, ens trobem amb un bon equilibri de xiulets i (majoritàriament) ronca en el camí.


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© Drets d'Autor 2017 Data My Pet. Fet amb per 8acceleri Estudi

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