How Do You Know You Are In Love?

I remember the first time I fell in love. And I think the truth probably is that you know it in your heart instantly. You know the difference between all those crushes and strong feelings you had for people and the way you feel about this one person. In saying that, how you know boils down to a few reasons which I have listed below.

Vulnerability

When you love someone you are at your most vulnerable. You want to please them, impress them, make them happy. Say they lose their wallet for example you are the first one looking for it. And it isn’t in that way of ‘Oh, that poor person lost their wallet.’ It’s more deeper than that. You can’t bear any bad thing happening to them. They are too good of a person for anything bad to happen to them. They don’t deserve anything bad to happen to them. They have opened you up to feelings that you thought didn’t exist and it’s more wonderful than you could ever have imagined. You start getting into the music they like. You never know, it just might be the start of a conversation. And if it’s unrequited, so be it. The joy you get from the way you feel about them overrides any of the hurt (or near insanity!) that you are feeling because you can’t have them. So basically been vulnerable and lost in everything about them is probably the main way you’d know and knowing that you would give up all your dreams to be with them. I think that’s probably how I knew because I’m very ambitious and the last thing I want is to be tied down young but if he’d have wanted me back and he wanted to settle down I know at the time I would have for him which I know I wouldn’t do for every man.

Talking About Them Constantly

This is a difficult one because you do have this about people you have crushes on too but it is a factor in been in love too. It’s just that it’s in addition to other factors on this list when you’re in love as opposed to been infatuated. I remember talking a lot to my sister about the guy I was in love with. I didn’t tell her but she knew. She admitted she did ages after because I couldn’t shut-up about how wonderful he was, how funny he was, how kind he was, how he’d include me, the shy one, in conversations.

Been Over Happy By Them Showing You Attention

Yes, you can get very happy by someone you fancy showing any form of attention but when you love someone it’s more than that. It feels a bit like a connection. In their life they talked to you! Which sounds a bit sad but it is natural when you love someone because you see them as perfect where you don’t see yourself as perfect. And when they mention your name it sounds like a melody. Like the most wonderful thing you’ve ever heard. And when I say connection it can be a possible romantic connection but if it’s unrequited, it can be a friendship connection. The thing is if they don’t love you back but you love them you still want them in your life in some capacity and it’s open to debate whether that would be the healthiest situation in the world but it’s definitely how the human emotions at play work.

A Longing

There is a deep longing to be in their company and when you think you might never see them again there is this empty feeling inside. It’s torturous really. Then if you have a few drinks, it gets worse. You start crying. And you probably wouldn’t feel like that over a crush. It’s an empty feeling of not having them in your life and feeling like your life is never going to be complete without them. Like it’s a half life. Everything you achieve won’t matter. But you get through that. It’s a long road but you do come out the other side.


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