Pet Life naučene lekcije iz Mačke i odnosima
Kad sam prvi put susreo moj dečko, Christopher, prije pet godina, I had only one pair of flat shoes – scuffed boots from college. Thinking back on my undergraduate experience, Sumnjam da čak ih nosili 10 puta, kao visoke pete provodi većinu mojih putovanja i iz klase osim centimetar leda obložene kampusu, at which point I relied on a wedge. Alright, Ja ukrašen potonje (nešto.) A girly girl in every way, Nisam znao kako da sweatpants lijepa ili osjećate ugodno pokazuje moje lice bez šminke maske, and I never foresaw this changing. But it did, i nadam se da radi za druge žene, kao.
Nije da nešto nije u redu s šminka i štikle - uživajte u njima! Just don’t depend on them. When I look at magazines and the constant barrage of media surrounding us, I don’t have to wonder why so many women are on shaky ground in the confidence department. I share with you the following lessons I’ve learned from my feline companions and the straight-shooting man in my life:
1. Zagrljaj svoje pojedinačne oznake: On one of my first summer dates with Chris, I panicked about how pale I looked and resorted to self-tanner. When I say I’m pale, Mislim da sam alabastera graniči proziran, so this quick-fix led to nothing but streaks of orange and regret. When he (svjesno) pitanje ako bih stavio na self-suncanje, Došao sam čist (iako ne u doslovnom smislu, kao da su uključeni tjedan piling.) He asked me why I would do that considering I had a beautiful and rare skin tone. I’d never heard anyone refer to my skin that way, i osjećao sam se tako glupo jer pokušava promijeniti nešto jedinstveno s proizvodom koji je mirisao metalik i ostavi moje pidžame i bijele haljine zamutila.
Naši partneri žele da izgledaju poput nas, a mi bi trebali žele, kao. It’s similar to having a dating profile photo that looks nothing like you, photoshopped past the point of recognition. We’re all unique, and those things that make us different also make us stand out from the crowd. Find the confidence to show your real markings and not covet others’.
Što se tiče mačaka, the same holds true. A calico is no more beautifully marked than a tabby – it’s all in the eye of the beholder.
2. Ne tijelo sramotu: Dvije moje mačke su maleni, dvojica su prosječne građe, and two are large. They do not know this. My biggest cat jumps on the cats half his size and wonders why they aren’t thrilled with the wrestling play date. If only women could stop the body-bashing we both despise and oddly facilitate. We come in all kinds of shapes and sizes, and yet I hear so many of my friends go on and on about perceived body flaws. These perceptions are then coupled with fears about how men view their bodies in comparison to Victoria’s Secret models. That kind of self-talk leads to generalizations we make about not only our own bodies, but bodies in general. I cringe when I hear quotes like, “Real women are curvy.” Beautiful women come in an array of shapes, so let’s embrace whatever figure sees us in our healthiest form. Men don’t want to hear us tear apart our bodies, i svi smo suviše često ih staviti u situacijama u kojima se ne može pobijediti, no matter their responses. Kate Upton, Kate Winslet, i Kate Moss su svi različiti gradi, ali nisu svi oni univerzalno smatra lijepa?
Za najdulji vrijeme, Nisam mogao stajati da mi noge nisu stick-tanka, so imagine my surprise when Chris told me that he loved my legs and recommended that I wear more shorts and skirts. The right person is going to like your body and not force you to reshape it. Always remember that.
3. Uživajte u hrani: Ah, the thrill of treats. When I shake that bag of enticement, all six of my cats charge forward at my feet. They love food to the point where it’s an event. Who can blame them? Like so many women, I waged war with food as I suffered the above-noted body shame of not feeling perfectly svelte in a bikini. I weigh five pounds more now than when Chris and I first met, ali u zamjenu za to, I’ve shared lots of pizza with him during Friday night TV binges. I wouldn’t trade those for any number on the scale. I’m far more comfortable with my body at 31 nego što sam ikada bio u mojoj mladosti.
Jesti zdravo je divna stvar, i ja sam čvrsto vjeruje u brigu o sebi (pogledajte u nastavku.) Enjoying life and all its flavors, iako, je prilično velika stvar, kao. Don’t focus so much on your calorie intake that you lose track of enjoying the meal – and the conversation that accompanies it.
4. Čuvaj se: When my cats are tired, they sleep. (Svi su apsolutno iscrpljena, usput.) When another cat upsets them or invades a designated space, they have no reluctance in voicing disdain. So often, naglašavamo više govori naš um, or we let someone treat us in a way that we wouldn’t treat someone else. Mačke, i ljudi se toga tiče, imaju tendenciju da puše i da završimo s, thus moving on with their lives and not holding on to resentment or bitterness. They usually don’t take things so personally, i oni znaju da je bolje pustiti svoje prave osjećaje pokazati nego nositi na čin i raznijeti kasnije.
Iskrenost je kritično u odnosima, and the right partner will love you even when you’re less than loveable to the outside world. If you can’t voice what you really want, onda kako će vaš partner ga dati?
To je tako teško jedan, especially for those of us who strive toward agreeableness. If it’s any help, try to think of wording things in a way that you would not take offense at if they were said to you. That way, you’re saying what you think without having to lose sleep over the issue. The more you do this, the more naturally it will come to you. In my home, ruglo i preo su oba zajedničke zvukove, i obojica ukazuju na vrstu poštovanja: drugima i sebi.
5. Postoje u trenutku: I’m always amazed at how my cats watch birds with a focus similar to how Chris plays video games. The old adage of stopping to smell the roses is famous for a reason – which brings me back to high heels.
Moja stara kolekcija cipela je imao neke raskošnih boja i strappy ukrasima, a ja još uvijek imaju dosta para čeka u mom ormaru za pravo odijelo, or at least for this polar vortex to lose its grip. When Chris and I went on our first trip together to Las Vegas, Upakiran sam oko pet para, zamišljajući beskrajne šljokice i perje (očigledno, u mojoj glavi, Vegas značilo odijevanje kao igračica.) How many of those pairs did I end up wearing? Zero. Umjesto, moja ciljna sandale tuku konkretno strip koji tjedan, and I remember feeling so thankful I had them. Countless girls struggled around us in platform shoes, crippled by peep-toe torture. I sincerely wanted to offer them a bench and some band-aids, Znajući da mojim ranim dvadesetima sebe bi se borili zajedno s njima.
Moje mačke nikada ne bi propustiti vjeverica promatranje samo kako bi mogli izgladiti svoje krzno na mjesto, i ja nikad ne bi mogao držati korak s Chrisom sam imao istrošene sandale s 4 inch lift. Često, Najbolji odmor oslanjaju na razuman obuće i trošenje vremena radi gotovo ništa.
Život je sve o rastu, and relationships can help us better understand ourselves as we stumble and succeed. Likewise, odnosi mogu imati koristi od samopouzdanja, odgovorni iskrenost, and indulging in some treats now and then. Nadajmo se, možemo naći dobar balans sikće i (uglavnom) purrs putu.