Kodi Dateable?

A mndandanda wa njira kudziwa nokha pang'ono bwino, kupanga inu "ndi lotta pokha" zambiri dateable

Cholakwa ambiri anthu awo chibwenzi miyoyo sukhala ndi maganizo abwino amene iwo, okha, ali. It may seem counterintuitive, koma pamene inu mwachangu kuyesera kupeza bwenzi ndi chimodzi cha zinthu zina kuganizira wekha ndi zimene zimapangitsa inu “Mafunso Chongani”. Women, kuposa anthu, sachedwa “Ndimakonda Kaya Mukufuna”-Syndrome (mwinamwake chifukwa achezera chikhalidwe amayembekezera kuti akazi akuyenera kukhala otha, amorphous amene akusowa zawo zofuna), kwenikweni chifukwa mu ngwosakhutiritsa ndipo unfulfilling ubwenzi kwambiri; ndi zodabwitsa, tangotaya nthawi yathu ndi mkwiyo pa wina ndi “zinasintha”, pa zikachitika.

Mmodzi wa ndimaikonda mawu amapita motere–kodi munthu wina akuyenera kumadziwa ndi kukukondani, ngati simukudziwa ndi kukukondani? Investing in knowing yourself allows you to know exactly what you bring to the table, ndipo mosavuta lanu Zabwino wina kuzindikira mzake ndi anakopeka makhalidwe Sapita kusintha ndi gulu lako kapena ndi zaka.

Monga Shel Silverstein analemba mu ndakatulo, “Masks”:

Iye anali buluu khungu
Pamodzi ndi iye
Iye anapitiriza ilo
Pamodzi ndi iye
Ankafufuza buluu
Moyo wawo wonse kudzera
Kenako anadutsa kumene–
Ndipo sindinkadziwa

Pano pali njira kudziwa ndi kukukondani, kuti winawake angathe, Ifenso!

1. Take Yourself Out

Uyu kuwinduka kuzungulira osiyanasiyana ndi myriad “odzithandiza” gurus, Mabuku, and women’s groups. People usually think about it in terms of dinner, which can be intimidating and awkward if you have not dined in public alone before. So it can be any significant outing, bola n'kosangalatsa ndi chinachake mumasangalala–filimu (kamodzi magetsi kutsikira, palibe lolunjika pa amene ali yekha), masewero a mpira, kapena mwinamwake ulendo kwinakwake latsopano.

2. What Do YOU Want To Do Today?

Ena ufulu nthawi? Stop for a minute and blatantly ask yourself what would make you happy right then and there–ndiyeno izo! This is one of the most simple and effective ways to tune out the noise of life and stop wasting time by being sucked into Facebook or television. It also opens you up to that many more random, zamatsenga amatsutsa ndipo motsatana, ndi kuchita kuti anthu ambiri kuposa mungafune, thoughtlessly and unconsciously killing time. In the process, mupeza kuti simuyenera munthu pamodzi kukhala osangalala–mungakhale osangalala ndi mosadziletsa ndi kukhala watanthauzo ndi mumasankha.

3. Ask Your Friends

This is kind of an elaboration of the popular Facebook activity asking people to comment to the post with a word that describes the poster. But you can learn about yourself, kapena za anthu kulingalira ndi chidwi nokha, by asking your friends how they would describe you. This will help to illuminate the “Inu” kuti inu kupereka kwa dziko, and therefore dates. Mwina, ndi zambiri, this matches with what you believe is your genuine self. But if you are unwittingly perceived as having a different character than what you know is true about you–izi zikhoza kukhala kuonetsa ngati chingwe zinalephera, zosokoneza ubwenzi.

4. Try New Things

This is kind of the opposite of #2. Instead of treating yourself to something you know you’ll like doing, kuchita chinachake kwathunthu latsopano! Never ridden a horse before? Find a company that offers easy trail rides. I wouldn’t advocate doing anything that frightens the pants off of you, chifukwa–pamene kuti akhoza kuwakopera madeti–your fear may distract from being able to enjoy a new experience. At the end of the day, mudzakhala olekanitsidwa moyo zomwe zimathandiza chimatanthauza inuyo ndi zofuna, ndipo mwina wina luso ndi kukambirana mfundo kubweretsa tebulo.

Having a confident sense of self is attractive. By cultivating your sense of self, mudzakhala wosangalala, kwambiri kukwaniritsidwa munthu ndipo mudzapeza kuti kuli kupereka kwa chibwenzi; panopa, inu mudzayenera zambiri zosangalatsa kudziwa za inu kuti ndinu zonse.


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