Nei Varume Love utsinye Queen nyuchi
Ichi kudanana paIndaneti, uye kudanana nzvimbo vanoda dzinovaraidza, kwete zvishoma. So can we talk for just a minute about female dogs? And I mean “imbwa hadzi” Wekumusoro euphemistic Mupfungwa, sezvo Anorondedzera kwete canines, but their human species counterpart that gives female dogs their bad name. But because this is a SFW site and in an effort to give back to female dogs the respect and love they deserve—let’s talk instead about Heartless Queen Bees (kana HQBs) uye varume vanovada, uye chii pane kudzidza kubva kwavari kuti ukama hwedu pachedu nani.
Nguva nenguva zvakare, Ndakanga chapupu vomuzana ruoko kuti chinonakidza pamusoro “zvakanaka Guy anoda HQB”. It’s really a marvel to behold—a caring, mhando unovhunduka, noruremekedzo uye rupo murume anoita nguva dzose kuva pachinzvimbo Achikotamazve nenhendashure nokuda HQB ake; and he seems to also love every minute of responding to her demands and bearing the brunt of her indiscriminate disdain. But these relationships are also some of the best I’ve seen in terms of longevity; uye saizvozvowo, Handina vaziva, tichitarisa dzimwe Kumbova ukama kubudirira.
Saka zvatinogona, sezvo vakadzikama, vakadzi akanyatsofungwa vanodzidza kubva HQBs kukwezva uye kuchengeta varume mhando kuti vanoita sokuti havana dambudziko yokukwezva vachirichengeta?
1) HQBs vane yakasimba yokuzivikanwa
HQBs know who they are and what they want. They know what they bring to the table and they are interesting because their interests are their own and they may be unique from their partner’s interests. It is boring to date yourself, uye HQBs zvavakaitawo izvi.
2) HQBs vane murayiro munyika yavo
An HQB sokuti kuva murayiro wenyika vakamupoteredza (kana iye zvechokwadi kana kuti kwete). This quality provides a subconscious boost to her partner’s ego—if he has some control over making her happy, uye iye ane masimba pamusoro “Nyika”, Iye ane simba “Nyika” by proxy. It’s that whole “kana A = B uye B = C, ipapo A = C” thing. How does this translate into a useful tip? Decent, thoughtful people like you and me tend to not be very assertive with our actions and communication. Being assertive is much different than being aggressive, rinova inokosha M.O. dzako avhareji HQB uye chii anopa wake kuti kutsarukana, tenuous kudzora “Nyika”. But being more assertive will yield a greater command of your world, without the otherwise negative results of aggression. One example of this is simply to state what you want and why it makes sense from your perspective, sans ari achizvidza, anozvideredza hasha saka kazhinji akashandisa mukuita akafanana zvikumbiro kubudikidza HQBs.
3) The nokusingaperi-dzakakurumbira uye vakaedzwa, “Men Kufanana Challenge”!
Vangani kufambidzana nyaya uye mabhuku vane here kuverenga kuti vakazvipira kuna vamwe shanduro chikuru yokuti vanhu vanoda kupiwa aine chinetso, saka vanofunga zvokuwedzera rinokosha kana vanokwanisa kukunda vakati dambudziko? Men, pachavo, will speak of finding the more elusive woman more attractive than the one who is an always-available open book. Sometimes elusiveness manifests as—how should I say—being a little stingy with expressing any kind of positive emotion or feedback (riri uko HQBs kupinda). Some men can’t resist the challenge of trying to illicit any kind of pleasant response from an HQB and so she becomes an object of great interest.
Unoita sei (zvakare, sezvo vakadzikama, mukadzi funga muri) tendeukai pachako zvivepo zvakaoma zvikuru? This can easily become the disingenuous game-playing that books like “The rules” (Fein uye Schneider) zvose, which may not work for everyone and may leave you ill-feeling and confused about what to say and when. pachinzvimbo, build up your life to be genuinely full and exciting—making you a true challenge to nail down a date with. Not only will it check off that whole “kuva kwakaoma” kupona kuti saka ungracefully uchiitwa HQBs (kuti vanhu vanowana anoyevedza), asi zuva rako Uchanzwa kuti zvakawanda aikoshesa kana kwawakaita pfungwa kupedza wako zvakajeka inokosha nguva naye.
4) No mitambo
Pane nguva apo vanhu rega kuteerera guessing mitambo-kana iri nemhaka vari zvishoma vakura, or the relationship itself having grown beyond its initial flirtation. Perhaps this tip can be at least partially credited with the whole “longevity” anomaly presented by HQB/Nice Guy relationships. HQBs say what they want, and when they want it. There are few games and intangibles in dealing with an HQB, and many men find this refreshing. This ties in elements from a couple of previous tips—in being straightforward with your communication (i.e. kuva dzika), uye zvakajeka vane zvamunoda kubva mudiwa wako kana asina nechakare chacho, maita akasuma dambudziko kuti achaita zvichida vanonakidzwa achipindira akasangana nokuti wanga zvakajeka saka iye haungatyi ake kuita achava pasina.
saka, Mwoyo-tora Kind mwoyo, uye mazano aya mwoyo-uye pamwe tinogona vanoti kurei mugove Nice Guy musika nokuti isu!