Tse hlano Life Lessons Ile a Ithuta Cats le Likamano
Ha ke qala ho kopana 'na le mohlankana, Christopher, tse hlano tse fetileng, I had only one pair of flat shoes – scuffed boots from college. Thinking back on my undergraduate experience, Ke belaella ke esita le ne a apara ba 10 linako tse ling, e le lieta tse phahameng jara ba bangata ba ka maeto a le ho tswa ho sehlopha sa ntle le haeba senthimithara ea leqhoa e a tlotsitsoeng mo khamphaseng, at which point I relied on a wedge. Alright, Ke embellished e qetellang (a batla a.) A girly girl in every way, Ke sa tsebe ho etsa sweatpants le ntle kapa phutholohile ho bontša ka sefahlehong sa litlolo maske, and I never foresaw this changing. But it did, le ke tšepa e etsetsang basali ba bang ba, hammoho.
Ke ke hore ho na le 's letho le phoso le litlolo le stilettos - thabela ba! Just don’t depend on them. When I look at magazines and the constant barrage of media surrounding us, I don’t have to wonder why so many women are on shaky ground in the confidence department. I share with you the following lessons I’ve learned from my feline companions and the straight-shooting man in my life:
1. Amohele hao motho ka mong markings: On one of my first summer dates with Chris, I panicked about how pale I looked and resorted to self-tanner. When I say I’m pale, Ke bolela ke alabaster moeling translucent, so this quick-fix led to nothing but streaks of orange and regret. When he (itse,) a belaella haeba ke ne ke apara ho se ho intša mosuhi oa matlalo, Ke ile hloekileng (le hoja ke sa ka tsela ea sebele, e le hore amehang ka beke ea exfoliation.) He asked me why I would do that considering I had a beautiful and rare skin tone. I’d never heard anyone refer to my skin that way, le Ke ne ke bobo bakeng sa ho leka ho fetola ntho e ikhethang le o entsoeng ka smelled metallic le ile ka tlohela pajamas le ba basweu apara muddied.
Balekane ba rona batla hore re sheba joaloka rona, 'me re lokela ho batla ho, hammoho. It’s similar to having a dating profile photo that looks nothing like you, photoshopped past the point of recognition. We’re all unique, and those things that make us different also make us stand out from the crowd. Find the confidence to show your real markings and not covet others’.
Ha e le likatse, the same holds true. A calico is no more beautifully marked than a tabby – it’s all in the eye of the beholder.
2. Etsa se wona mmele hlajoa ke lihlong: Tse peli tsa ka likatse ba nyenyane, tse peli tse ke tsa karolelano haha, and two are large. They do not know this. My biggest cat jumps on the cats half his size and wonders why they aren’t thrilled with the wrestling play date. If only women could stop the body-bashing we both despise and oddly facilitate. We come in all kinds of shapes and sizes, and yet I hear so many of my friends go on and on about perceived body flaws. These perceptions are then coupled with fears about how men view their bodies in comparison to Victoria’s Secret models. That kind of self-talk leads to generalizations we make about not only our own bodies, but bodies in general. I cringe when I hear quotes like, “Real women are curvy.” Beautiful women come in an array of shapes, so let’s embrace whatever figure sees us in our healthiest form. Men don’t want to hear us tear apart our bodies, 'me kaofela re-le eena o-hangata e le li kenya ka maemo a moo ba ileng ba ka ke ke ba hapa, no matter their responses. Kate Upton, Kate Winslet, le Kate Moss ba tse sa tsoaneng ba haha, empa ha ba kaofela ba ile ba hohle tlameha ntle?
Bakeng sa telele ka ho fetisisa nako, Ke ne ke sa ema hore maoto a ka a ba ne ba sa khomarela-tšesaane, so imagine my surprise when Chris told me that he loved my legs and recommended that I wear more shorts and skirts. The right person is going to like your body and not force you to reshape it. Always remember that.
3. Thabela lijo: Ah, the thrill of treats. When I shake that bag of enticement, all six of my cats charge forward at my feet. They love food to the point where it’s an event. Who can blame them? Like so many women, I waged war with food as I suffered the above-noted body shame of not feeling perfectly svelte in a bikini. I weigh five pounds more now than when Chris and I first met, empa ka le phapanyetsano bakeng sa hore, I’ve shared lots of pizza with him during Friday night TV binges. I wouldn’t trade those for any number on the scale. I’m far more comfortable with my body at 31 ho feta ke leha e le neng e ne e ke sa le mocha.
Eating healthy ke ntho e babatsehang, 'me ke ka tieo le molumeli ho hlokomela ga motho (sheba ka tlase.) Enjoying life and all its flavors, leha ho le joalo, ke le ntle ntho e khōlō, hammoho. Don’t focus so much on your calorie intake that you lose track of enjoying the meal – and the conversation that accompanies it.
4. Itlhokomele: When my cats are tired, they sleep. (Ba ntse u tsohle feletseng khathetse, ebile.) When another cat upsets them or invades a designated space, they have no reluctance in voicing disdain. So often, re hatisa ka bua likelello tsa rona, or we let someone treat us in a way that we wouldn’t treat someone else. Cats, le banna ba le hore le e taba, ba le le tsekamelo ea ho hiss le ho holim'a eona le, thus moving on with their lives and not holding on to resentment or bitterness. They usually don’t take things so personally, 'me ba tseba hore ho molemo ho a ke hao oa' nete maikutlo a bontša ho feta ho tsoele pele ho e nka bohato 'me letsa ka hamorao.
Botsepehi ke mahlonoko tseo ho leng malebana le dikamano, and the right partner will love you even when you’re less than loveable to the outside world. If you can’t voice what you really want, kamoo joale tla molekane wa hao le fa eona?
Sena ke e joalo e ka thata e mong, especially for those of us who strive toward agreeableness. If it’s any help, try to think of wording things in a way that you would not take offense at if they were said to you. That way, you’re saying what you think without having to lose sleep over the issue. The more you do this, the more naturally it will come to you. In my home, le sheshang le hlabang le purring bobeli tloaelehileng marata a, le bobeli ba bona ba bontša e le mohuta wa tlhompho e: ba bang le re le.
5. Teng motsotso oo o: I’m always amazed at how my cats watch birds with a focus similar to how Chris plays video games. The old adage of stopping to smell the roses is famous for a reason – which brings me back to high heels.
Ka ea khale boots pokello ne ba bang ba gorget ka mebala le strappy embellishments, le ke ntse ke e e telele a tse seng kae lipara ho letile ka oteropo bakeng sa le tokelo ya seaparo, or at least for this polar vortex to lose its grip. When Chris and I went on our first trip together to Las Vegas, Ke tletse tse ka bang hlano lipara, nahana sa feleng sequins le masiba (kamoo ho bonahalang kateng, a hlooho ea ka, Vegas ne se bolela apara joaloka showgirl.) How many of those pairs did I end up wearing? Zero. Ho e-na, ka liphofu meqathatso otla wa dintho tse tshwarehang hlobolisa bekeng eo, and I remember feeling so thankful I had them. Countless girls struggled around us in platform shoes, crippled by peep-toe torture. I sincerely wanted to offer them a bench and some band-aids, tseba hore ke le lilemong tsa twenties ho intša ne e tla ba loana ka thata 'moho le bona.
Ka likatse ne a ke ke hopotse tsoe ho lent-ho shebella le hore feela ba ne a ka boreleli ba bona ba boea khutlela sebakeng, le ho mohla ke ka be a tsoela pele le Chris ne ke ya kgale meqathatso le 4 inch lift. Hangata, molemo ka ho fetisisa phomolo itšetleha ka nang le kelello lieta ba dirisang madi ka lihora tse etsa hoo e batlang e ha ho letho le.
Bophelo ke tsohle ka ho hōla, and relationships can help us better understand ourselves as we stumble and succeed. Likewise, likamano ka rua molemo ho itšepa, nang le boikarabelo botsepehi, and indulging in some treats now and then. tšepo, re fumana e ntle tekatekano ya hisses le (boholo) purrs hammoho ka tsela eo.