Romance, Imvakalelo okanye into Senza?

Ukuba ujonga i elithi 'romance' kwisichazi-magama kuyo lubalwa zombini njengesibizo kunye nesenzi! Ngoko ke yintoni kanye romance?

Ndikhumbula emva ixesha xa ndandidla nzima ngenene kwi ngokuthandana, Mna kunye ex ethile kwaye thina uzama ukugcina 'ulwalamano lwethu besifa, ngoko sagqiba ekubeni siza kuba 'ebusuku umhla' veki nganye. Akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngaloo nto, enyanisweni ukuba ngeveki 'ebusuku umhla' into endiya ngokubonakalayo khuthaza abantu bam, ukuba benze, Kodwa oko khumbula ngalo olu lwalamano ethile kukuba akazange Akukhathaliseki zingaphi imihla saya kwi, le romance iphinde ibuye! iimvakalelo zethu yatshintsha. Ke ngoko Saye akukho mahluko oko ke ngonaphakade kufuthi kangakanani sahlala ngaphaya etafileni enye kwenye indawo luthando, kwakukho nangoku akukho romance kuthi kule meko ethile.

Ngoko ke, oku kubonisa ukuba awukwazi ukunyanzela romance.

Kubonisa ukuba unako ukwenza izinto kunye, apho abantu abaninzi sikubiza ngokuba 'uthando', nangona kunjalo ukuba iimvakalelo emva iintshukumo azikho apho ke ngokwenene uvakalelwa uthando kakhulu maxa onke, enyanisweni kusuke kuvakale ngathi okuwisa amazinyo. Ngaba wakha wahlala nomntu nanisathandana phezu esidlweni phandle kwaye andizange ndizive kunene? Ndiqali- amagqa- nzima, okanye mhlawumbi kukho iingxwabangxwaba kunye imvakalelo embi emoyeni. Xa oku kunjalo akunamsebenzi ukuba uthando isimo sentlalo okanye umsebenzi okwenzayo, kanye oku kulingana ukuya 'romance'. Ngomhla Flipside ndiya Kananjalo banokucinga amaxesha xa ndenze izinto nomntu ezibe nje uthando konke konke, ezifana nokuhamba okodaka wellies zethu emvuleni, ukanti ke nangoku waziva ngothando, ngenxa iimvakalelo kunye uxhulumaniso ndisabelana loo mntu.

Njani ngabo Abalingane ubona phandle ndawonye ukuba aye ngokucacileyo ingxoxo - njani uthando ngokuhlwa yabo iya kuba? Mhlawumbi kusindiswa, Ukuba omnye wabo wenza into uthando eyathi yaphula kulengqele kwakhona izakufunyanwa iimvakalelo zothando. Enyanisweni musa besithi make-up ngesondo kunokuba shushu? (Kuba abafazi bam abathengi Ndincomela ukufumana ubudlelwane apho uthando nangomdla kuyahluka, kunokuba ashushu nabandayo).

Njengoko nowasetyhini uSonia yokuba xa umntu uya kuhamba indlela ende ukwenza into uthando ngenxa yomfazi wakhe kubhaliwe kuthakazelelwa kakhulu, nokuba mhlawumbi umfazi wathi uthandana kuphela ndoda yathi, yaye Ndandingaqinisekanga malunga naye, Ngokubanzi singabafazi siyayixabisa izijekulo uthando. Kodwa ke nokuba le meko phezu phezulu, njengesenzo romantic engafunwayo kunokuba nzima kakhulu, ngoko ke iphi na umgca?

Kuthetha ntoni romance kuthetha kuwe? Ngaba kufanelekile kuzo zonke iimeko ukuba kutheni? Ngaba kusetyenziswa okuphilisa alungise ubudlelwane okanye alumeke uthando kunye nothando? Le yimibuzo umdla ukubuza.

Yinto ngokuqinisekileyo kokuxabana ngamacala amabini. Mna ngokobuqu abonisa ukuba uthando yimvakalelo, leyo siyakuziswa ngesenzo okanye uthotho lwamanyathelo. Umzekelo, ukuba izicwangciso umyeni wam umhla entle kuthi, kwaye uya iinzame ukuba undise ngaphandle, okanye ubonisa ukuya ekhaya kunye neqela elikhulu seentyatyambo kum, oku kuya zivuse umnyele ngokuthandana ngaphakathi kwam. Ndiya kuziva ngendlela ethile yaye ndiya ukwabelana ukuba naye. Ndingavuya oko akwenzileyo kwaye oko kuya kwenza ndizive Ulibengezelele. le, ekujikeni, kuya kumenza azive kakuhle.

Kodwa yintoni umdla ngokwenene kum kukuba singabafazi Siyakwazi ukuvelisa uthando kuba thina zonke ngokwethu! Ndibhekisela kwinto ngulo kukuba xa umfazi ufunda nje 'kuba' ovethe yakhe, amandla esobukhomokazi, yena banokuziva uthando, nokuba akukho mntu langoku. Le imvakalelo aokusetyenziswa kusetyenziswa ashushu, amakhandlela, ne massage aromatherapy, ukunxiba iimpahla ezintle kunye nangezinye iindlela ezininzi. Ngoko ke oku kukwenza amadoda akufuneki? Hayi, kakhulu ukuya koko, Mna ndicebisa ukuba xa umntu obhinqileyo athambe kwaye namava uvelwano ngothando, oku kuvulela indawo waqonda umntu naye xa enze into wongeza kule imvakalelo.

Ukuba uyazi indlela yam ukuba uthandane niya kwazi ukuba mna ndiyakholwa kwiindima isiduna zobufazi amandla ngaphakathi ulwalamano, ngoko umfazi esobukhomokazi bendiya ayithethi 'ukwenza' izinto uthando umntu wakhe, Kodwa ukwenza isithuba ngokuthandana ye 'imvakalelo' kunye 'ukuba', uze ukwabelana ukuba indoda yakhe kunokuba entle. Kwakhona isekwabongoza imfuneko yakhe ukuba abe isiduna ukukholisa umfazi wakhe ngokwenza izinto zayo ezenza onwabe. Ukuba ngaba ulibhinqa kwaye ungathanda romance ngakumbi ulwalamano lwakho ndinicebisa uzama oku. Ke ukuba indoda ufuna 'kuphumelela' umfazi ukuba uthandana, okanye zazise angathabatheki umva ulwalamano onalo ngoku kwi, Ndicebisa 'ngokwenza' into uthando kuye, ngomoya lokwenyaniso romance emva iintshukumo!

Yonwaba.

Julie.


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